


Envious

by kinglyace



Series: Tumblr Prompts [3]
Category: Final Fantasy XV
Genre: M/M, Pre-ship, author starts projecting on favorite character, brotherhood era, ignis deals with self doubt
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-17
Updated: 2018-01-17
Packaged: 2019-03-05 23:12:22
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,625
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13398282
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kinglyace/pseuds/kinglyace
Summary: Jealousy is the reaction to the threat of losing something dear, where envy is the reaction to lacking something desired. Even if it seems small and inconsequential.In which Ignis grapples with his envy of Gladiolus Amicitia and his own personal failings.





	Envious

**Author's Note:**

> Tumblr prompt for aliatori! Envy+ Gladnis!  
> This also got a little out of hand and I'M SORRY I JUST RELATE TO IGGY A LOT!

            Pride and envy were things usually beaten out of soldiers, from the moment they started training. Envy gave way to fits of anger towards comrades and pride led to egos bigger than the Citadel itself. Suppression of emotion was never the intent, but it was agreed that envy and pride were unwieldy and dangerous emotions.

            So, when Ignis felt the familiar pang deep in his stomach, he could barely hold back a disgusted scowl. It wasn’t in his nature to let his baser feelings take hold, even less so with the intensive training of the Crownsgaurd being drilled into him. He was not _supposed_ to be this way. No, Ignis should have just locked those thoughts away and shoved it back like he had been trained too.

            Instead, he found himself wrestling with his own personal monster every time he came across Gladio. It didn’t seem to matter where, whether it be the training rooms or when they exchanged polite greetings when passing Noct off to the other.

            Gladio was just so… perfect, at least to Ignis. He was handsome and a gifted fighter, with an impressive intellect behind those amber eyes. He’d been trained his whole life to defend and fight for Noct, pushed until he was the paragon of perfection. Gladio could best nearly any other fighter in the Crownsgaurd their age and even a few older than himself. He was just as skilled at strategy as Ignis, even a little better in some regards. _But,_ Ignis told himself many a night, _I can catch up to him. With time and training, I can match him and even surpass him._

            But his envy wouldn’t be sated there.

 

            Outside of battle and tactics, Gladio was smooth and unbearably gifted with socializing. He could talk, joke and banter with anyone with such ease that made Ignis want to _scream_. How could one man be so good at fighting in both the physical and social realms? Sure, Ignis could weave his words with council members during meetings but that was far different. He could script out his responses, write down his thoughts in an orderly manner and rehearse over and over what he’d say before opening his mouth. Meetings were predictable- a comfortable realm in which Ignis dominated even at his tender age.

            But outside that council room, he floundered. He was far too serious compared to others his age and his tone flat. Oh, he tried to put himself out there, when he had the time. It never worked, of course. He’d burst into the conversation at inopportune times or would dominate by talking about the inane parts of cooking. By the time Ignis realized his actions, it would be too late. The other people would start to edge away or would look at their phones with clear disinterest. In the worst cases, they would interrupt and verbally push him away.

            And it hurt every time. His attempts were thrown out and stepped on, until he’d finally given up. If he were to be treated as an outsider, aloof and cold to others, then he would play that part.

            But that didn’t mean he wasn’t _envious_ of those skills. He and Gladio were being trained and pushed to become the Shield and Advisor of the Future King. They couldn’t afford a trivial weakness like being _inept at casual conversation._ There was no fixing it though, only trying to cope with his inherent flaw.

            If only it were that easy.

 

He found himself in the smaller training hall by himself one day, back to the door and trying to beat away his own negative thoughts with each jab of his wooden spear. His muscles burned with every lunge and his lungs were starting to feel as if they couldn’t keep up. Perhaps he’d been going harder than strictly necessary but… he’d seen Gladio in passing as he entered. The Shield in training had been running new recruits through their paces, knocking them down with the training swords and goading them on with lighthearted banter as if it were nothing.

            And Ignis felt his envy rear its ugly head again, making his chest swell and feel like his head was being squeezed with a vice. So, he turned and practically fled to the other side of the building, wrestling with these _feelings_ while he prepared for his solo session.

“Your stance is all off.”

            Ignis could feel his skin crawl as he turned, green eyes narrowing behind his glasses. Gladio stood in the door, stripped of his uniform and looking relaxed in a set of sweats and loose sweatshirt. A towel was slung around his shoulders and there was the faint sheen of sweat clinging to his skin. Of course, he’d probably just finished his training. And of course, he would so easily see Ignis’ failings as a fighter in one glance.

“You need to keep your legs wider, lower to the ground. You’re too easy to push over now,” Gladio added as he approached, dropping his towel to the wayside.

_Yes, of course, I’m failing at a basic technique that I should have already mastered_ , Ignis thought and the urge to snap at Gladio rose to the front of his mind. But he said nothing, only let himself remain still as Gladio circled around him.

“Move your feet like this,” Gladio instructed, moving Ignis’ feet with his own until the advisor had settled into an acceptable position.

            Then Gladio moved suddenly, pushing against Ignis’ shoulder and trying to dislodge him. Instead Ignis swung and grit his teeth as the pole connected with Gladio’s ribs. The Shield hopped away, ‘ _owing’_ and groaning but he didn’t seem upset.

“See? You didn’t topple over _and_ you got a good hit in there,” the other man said and he gave Ignis a wide grin.

            Ignis wanted to hit him again. He didn’t need a reminder about how much _better_ Gladio was.

“I appreciate the pointer but _why_ are you helping me?” Ignis asked in a low voice, rolling his shoulders as he stood up straight. Gladio’s smile faltered and his face twisted in confusion, one brow arching upwards.

“Really? I thought it was obvious,”

“Obvious to _you_ perhaps,” Ignis muttered but he regretted the choice of words. He couldn’t reveal more weaknesses, especially not to Gladio of all people.

            Gladio heaved a sigh and lifted a hand to run it through his sweaty hair.

“Just because we’re sworn to help the prince doesn’t mean we can’t help each other,” he shrugged and Ignis felt anger prick at his gut. It was a _good point_ but the irrational part of his mind cried that this just further proved how weak and ill-suited to his position he was. He needed to be strong enough to _not_ need help.

“How about a little sparring? I haven’t gotten to actually train with you since you first got introduced,” Gladio suggested and Ignis found himself grinding his teeth together. Social etiquette stated that it’d be rude of him to turn Gladio away.

“I suppose there’s no harm in it,” Ignis ground out between clenched teeth and Gladio only smiled. _God, he looked so good when he smiled_.

            Gladio of course, picked the nearly ridiculous wooden training great sword. It was perfect for him though, _just like everything else_.

 

            They began to circle around each other, and Ignis felt his anger starting to bubble out of control. All his efforts to avoid the source of his envy and insecurity were wasted and the man had the audacity to drive the point home. He was going to wipe the floor with Ignis and leave the advisor to wallow in his embarrassment.

_No, not this time!_

Ignis lunged and twisted, the butt of his spear coming up as Gladio brought his sword down. The blade bounced off his staff and Ignis spun on his heel, whacking Gladio across the ribs again with his spear. The Shield grunted but he didn’t fall over. He took a handful of hurried steps back, arms twisting to bring his sword down over Ignis’ head. It crashed against the mat, missing Ignis by a hair as he rolled to dodge. The world spun and the advisor found himself crouched, spear up and eyes locked on Gladio’s back.

_An opening_.

            Ignis darted forward and swung the spear, watching with satisfaction as it cracked against Gladio’s back and sent him sprawling against the mat with an undignified huff. Ignis’ jumped, raising the spear above his head and descending upon Gladio like a bird of prey.

            The end of his spear only met the spongey mat as Gladio rolled out of the way and to his feet. The Shield huffed, lifting his sword to block Ignis as he whirled and lunged again. The sound of wood meeting wood was satisfying and Ignis felt his body surge forward. He pressed in close, swiping at Gladio’s head and snarling when every blow was met with an impenetrable block. Gladio was too far above him in skill.

_No! I just need a better strategy._

            Ignis ducked as Gladio swung his head again and the advisor saw his chance. With a push from his legs, Ignis rushed forward and jabbed at the Shield’s vulnerable calf. Gladio crumpled with a grunt to one knee and Ignis found himself exploding with a fresh burst of energy.

            He swerved behind Gladio and brought his staff up under the Shield’s chin and against his throat, locking him into a headlock.

“I believe I win,” Ignis breathed and he felt his chest soar with joy. He, Ignis Scientia, had just bested the Crownsgaurd golden boy and top fighter. _Him,_ of all people.

            Perhaps there was hope for him yet, despite all his flaws and weaknesses.

**Author's Note:**

> I may have projected some of my own feelings onto Iggy cause growing up dealing with Autism wasn't fun and I feel the need to make my fave characters suffer like I did


End file.
